Sunday, March 22, 2009

Half-assed

I am frequently annoyed by my own tendency to start small projects and hobbies and never really GET there.

I remember collecting stamps, coins. 2 weeks and then I lost interest.
I remember playing drums, flute, trombone, clarinet. A few weeks/months and then I lost interest.
I remember dabbling with photography. 2 weeks and out...never long enough to actually go buy gear that would make all the difference.
I love skiing, scuba diving, soccer, swimming, board games, etc., but never enough to become obsessed. And never enough to become really good at it, I guess.
I started painting. I liked it a lot, although it was no easy ride. Half-assed again...now the terrible result hangs in the shed.

Right now, I am working with vector graphics to make some sort of T-shirt concept for my friend's music venue come late summer. I have a nice sketch, and I've made some neat effects...but I never seem to reach the point where it comes together for me. I suspect because my skills, although maybe better than average, are still relatively half-assed. Bloody annoying because all the concepts are in my head. The practical building is just not appealing enough to ever let me finish.

I know I am a terrible perfectionist, which might be why I hate half-assed stuff, which in turn leads me to abandon those half-assed projects, which in turn forces me into new domains of half-assed-ness. I'm a half-ass on the run, forever chasing my half-assed shadow.

This might sound depressing, but it's not really meant that way. I probably have quite broad domain knowledge because of this quirk. I am coming to terms with the fact that I am more conceptually oriented than action-minded. It has taken a bit of introspection to accept that, because actions are generally perceived the winner. Even if they are only half-assed.

Here's to concepts, ideas, and visions. Fully drawn potentials...nothing half-assed about those..! =)

1 comment:

madspedersen said...

Hear hear!